Coming out

If you are considering telling the people around you that you are lesbian or gay, this can be a liberating experience. It is sometimes called 'coming out'. However, if you choose not to, you don't have to tell anyone at all. People who have come out have often found it easier to tell close friends first, and they have found it to be a big relief. Coming out is a very important step that has to be thought through carefully, and only when you feel sure about your sexual identity. The Young Lesbian Information Project provides these guidelines for those thinking of coming out:

'If you are thinking of coming out to your parents/ guardians, wait and think about it. Better still, talk it through with someone. It is best to have thought through what you are going to say and to have some support ready, in case they react in a bad way. What would be the pros and cons of coming out at this particular point in your life? Would you be strong enough to handle rejection? Where would you live if they threw you out? Who could support you? Are there any clues in your past relationship with your parents to hint at what their reaction might be? Do you know of anyone who could help your parents work through their response and who could help you all talk?'

Being gay, lesbian or bisexual is not a way of life, it's a part of life. Straight people are not defined just by who they are attracted to, so there is no reason why you should be. Lesbians, gay men and bisexuals can be of any nationality, personality type, have many different interests and jobs and may spend time in lesbian or gay pubs and clubs or not spend any time on the scene at all. If you would like more information and advice see the AVERT website, Young People's Section.

How To Come Out To Your Parents - for advice watch this film:

How To Come Out To Your Parents

Useful Reading

Out in School is a free guide and provides teachers and other school staff with ideas they can use to help discuss topics like same sex relationships and homophobia with their students - produced and available from Terrence Higgins Trust (THT),